That lying bitch isn't "fun to be around"
Thứ Sáu, 10 tháng 11, 2017
How the U.S. Can Break Out of Its Long National Tax Nightmare
How the U.S. Can Break Out of Its Long National Tax Nightmare
What Cut Cut Cut won't solve.
November 9, 2017 at 08:34PM
via Digg http://ift.tt/2zwb1Au
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game.
They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents." Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"
Two scientists walk into a restaurant
The first one says, "I'll have a glass of H2O".
The second one says, "I'll also have a glass of water. We are not at work right now, why are you referring to it like that?"
The first scientist goes into the bathroom and weeps, for his murder plan had failed.
An Australian walks into a bar with a crocodile under his arm
An Australian walks into a bar with a crocodile under his arm.
He tells the bartender, “If I put my penis into this crocodile’s mouth for 15 seconds without it being bitten off, you’ll give me free drinks for the night.”
The bartender agrees, so the guy opens the crocodile’s mouth and puts his penis inside it. The crocodile gently closes his mouth and, after 15 seconds, the Australian hits it over the head with a bottle. The now-disoriented crocodile opens his mouth, allowing the guy to take out his penis.
The bartender, shocked, starts serving the free drinks to the Australian. He then announces to the bar, “If anyone else can do that, they’ll get free drinks for the night.”
After a slight pause, a blonde woman chirps, "Ok, I’ll do it, but please just don't hit me so hard over my head with the bottle.”
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