$3.00 in Saint Lucia, $2.50 in Belize, and $2 in Cuba.
Those are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
Thứ Tư, 11 tháng 4, 2018
Man and his wife join a weight loss club. They're told to try and lose at least 2 pounds by the next week.
When they return after a week the mentor asks them how much they lost.
The wife begins, "I lost 10 pounds".
"That's amazing! Well done, and you?" He says, pointing at the husband.
"Well, I actually gained 10 pounds", the husband responds.
"Oh, that's no good at all. How did that happen?" asks the mentor.
"I bet my wife a tenner she wouldn't lose any weight this week".
An engineering student is walking on campus one day when another engineer rides up on a shiny new motorcycle.
“Where did you get such a rocking bike?” asked the first.
The second engineer replied “Well, I was walking along yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ‘Take what you want.'”
The second engineer nodded approvingly “Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit!”
The Engineer in Hell
An engineer dies and goes to Hell.
He’s talking with Satan and says, “What a terrible place! It’s very hot, dark, smoky and extremely bad!”
Satan said, “Well, what did you expect? After all, this IS Hell!”
The engineer said, “Do you have a compressor, some tubing, and wire?
Satan said, “Yeah, we might have some of that stuff laying around somewhere. I’ll check and see what I can find for you.”
Satan finds the stuff. So, the engineer starts designing and building improvements. After a while, Hell has air conditioning, iced water, good lighting, flush toilets, and escalators. The engineer is a pretty popular guy!
One day God calls and tells Satan, “Say, we had a mix-up. I was checking records and discovered that by error an engineer got sent down to you. He should have come here in Heaven. All engineers go to Heaven. You need to transfer him up here instead.”
Satan says, "Why, things are going great. We've now got air conditioning, iced water, flush toilets, great lighting, and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next. We like him! We’re going to keep him.”
God is horrified. "That's clearly a mistake! He should never have gone down there in the first place! Send him up here immediately!"
Satan says, "No way! I really like having an engineer on the staff. I'm keeping him.”
God says, “Send him back up here or I'll sue you!” Satan laughs, “Yeah, right, God. Good luck on that. Where are you going to find a lawyer?!"
A terribly overweight blonde woman goes to her doctor about her weight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
“I want you to eat vegetables and grains for 2 days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for 2 weeks.
The next time I see you, you will have lost at least 5 pounds.”
When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds.
“Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor said, “Did you follow my instructions?”
The blonde nodded.
“I’ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.”
“From hunger, you mean?”
“No, from skipping.”
A man was sitting in traffic when a cop knocked on his window.
He rolled down the window and asked the officer: "Why is there such a traffic jam?"
Officer: "A group of terrorists kidnapped a few politicians and are blocking the road. They have threatened to burn the politicians alive in 1000 gallons of gasoline if they don't get a 5 million dollar ransom within the hour. I'm going from car to car collecting donations and would like to know if you'd please help."
Man: "Ok. How much are other people giving?"
Officer: "On average, about two gallons."
Make This Colorful Image Disappear Simply By Staring At It
Make This Colorful Image Disappear Simply By Staring At It
For the first few seconds you'll feel kind of dumb, and then about 10 to 20 seconds the colors should just... disappear. It's wild.
April 10, 2018 at 06:16PM
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