A man walks into a bar and orders a beer.

After having the beer, he asks the bartender for the bill.

"$3", says the bartender.

The man just for fun goes on and places a $1 coin on the three ends of the table. The bartender gives him a bad look but has no other option but to pick them up.

This happened for 3-4 days and everyday the bartender felt humiliated.

The next day, he orders a beer but couldn't find three $1 coins to pay the bill. So, he hands the bartender a $5 note. Now, the bartender gets all excited and thinks that it is his day to avenge the hard time he had because of this man. He then places the two $1 coins at the opposite ends of the table.

Now, with a shrewd smile and with all the excitement he goes to the man and says, "Go on, collect your change".

The man then takes out a $1 coin from his pocket and puts it in front of the bartender and says, "One more beer please."

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Dentists are racist and homophobic.

They want to make your teeth white and straight.

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The worst thing about celebrity deaths is the inevitable torrent of jokes referencing them from people trying to be witty when really it should be a time of mourning and respect. I won’t take any part in it.

So wake me up when it’s all over

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A frog

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline. His personal psychic advisor tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you." The frog is thrilled, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?" "No," says his advisor, "In her biology class."

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A woman on a train is refusing to let a tired soldier sit down

An American soldier, serving in World War II had just returned from several weeks of battle on the German front lines.

The soldier had been granted rest and relaxation and was on a train that was bound for London.

The train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train in hopes of finding an empty seat.

The only empty seat was directly adjacent to a well dressed middle aged English lady and was being used by her little dog.

The weary soldier asked, "Please ma'am, may I sit in that seat?"

The English woman looked down her nose at the solider and sniffed then said, "You Americans. You are such a rude class of people. Can't you see that my little pooch is using that seat?"

The soldier walked away, looking if there were any other unoccupied seats to use, but after another trip down to the end of the train, he found himself facing the woman with the dog again.

Again, the soldier asked, "Please lady. May I sit there? I'm very tired."

The English woman wrinkled her nose and snorted out loud, "You Americans! Not only are you rude, you are also extremely arrogant!"

The soldier didn't say anything else; he leaned over, picked up the little dog and tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the empty seat.

The Woman, at a loss for words; shrieked, railed and demanded that someone defend her and chastise the soldier.

An English gentlemen sitting across the aisle spoke up and said, "You know, sir, you Americans do seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You eat holding the fork in the wrong hand, you drive your autos on the wrong side of the road and now, sir, you've thrown the wrong bitch out the window!."

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Otto the German was driving from Germany to Paris to visit some relatives.

A French cop stops him and asks the usual questions:

cop: name?

Otto: Otto

cop: address?

Otto: 341 Brandenburg Street, Berlin

cop: Occupation?

Otto: no, just visiting...

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Starbucks job interview

"What's your name?".

"Alyssa".

"Could you spell that please?".

"L A R I S S A".

"When can you start?".

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