Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

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Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)

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Thứ Tư, 25 tháng 7, 2018

They finally figured out why the computerized self driving car has crashed...

They didn't install the driver.

I was walking around the city when i saw a man in a turban shaking his carpet on his balcony.

I shouted at him: "What's wrong, it isn't starting?"

Thứ Ba, 24 tháng 7, 2018

Women are the only creatures to defy the laws of gravity.

The heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up.

It was George the Mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a tidy gift envelope.

At the second house, they presented him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house, he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful blonde woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, which she closed behind him, and took him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.

When he had enough, they went downstairs and she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied, she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "But what's the dollar for?" "Well," she said, "Last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'Screw him. Give him a dollar.' The breakfast was my idea."

Why do only 2 Mexicans cross the border at a time?

Because the sign says no trespassing.

After death, what is the only organ in the female body which remains warm?

My penis ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

My kid says he came up with this one: A guy goes to interview for IKEA...

The manager says “Welcome! Come in and make a seat.”