My wife left me because I spent our entire life savings on a penis enlargement procedure.

She could not take it any longer.

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I got pulled over by a female cop...

When I rolled down my window to ask what was wrong, she said "NOTHING"

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Why is 6.9 the worst number？

It's a 69 interrupted by a period

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Here's A Perfect,

Here's A Perfect,
You know exactly what's coming, but you'll still smile when you it happens.

July 31, 2018 at 11:58PM
via Digg https://ift.tt/2LLFqU7

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I failed my math exam because I couldn’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6, and 500 as Roman numerals

IM LIVID

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What's worse than locking your keys in your car outside of an abortion clinic?

Having to go in and ask for a coathanger

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My wife walked in on me masturbating to an optical illusion.

I said, "Honey, it's not what it looks like!"

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