Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Hai, 6 tháng 8, 2018

Kidnapper: [on phone] we have your son.

Kidnapper: [on phone] we have your son. Wife: actually I’m holding my son. Kidnapper: [getting frustrated] then who the heck just asked for chocolate milk with a straw and made us cut the crust off his PB&J? Wife: oh god. Kidnapper: what? Wife. you have my husband....

The Nigerian king

Agnes, a middle-aged New York widow is feeling very lonely one day, so she decides to bite the bullet and try internet dating. Her initial attempts don't go very well, as most of the contact she receives varies from dick pics to guys asking for nudes. She's about to give up when one day she's contacted by a very polite, kind seeming gentleman named Odaka from Nigeria. They chat for weeks, even video-conferencing, and she eventually discovers that he is actually a king is his country and that his former spouse had also passed some years before....

A group of old friends discussed where they should meet for lunch for their reunion.

They were all aged about 40. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant, because the waitresses there were pretty. Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food was good and the wine selection was excellent. Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they...

I got fired from the unemployment office on Friday.

My boss said, “Clean our your desk, and I’ll see you in the office on Monday.”...

A little Muslim kid can't find his mother

A little Muslim kid, crying, can't find his mother in a supermarket. The store attendant asks, "What does your mother look like?" The kid says.. "I have no fucking idea."...

Chủ Nhật, 5 tháng 8, 2018

How do you know how heavy a red hot chili pepper is?

Give it a weigh, give a weigh, give it a weigh now......

Zeus is offering a seat in his Pantheon for the first person to complete his trials of strength.

An esteemed hero of all men approaches Olympus and thinks hey, why the hell not. If I lose I may be disappointed, but if I win I will join the legendary Gods of the Pantheon! So he makes his way to Zeus, excited to see what is in store for him in order to prove his worth to the Gods. Along the way, he sees dozens of noble warriors, bodybuilders and others laying on the ground, devastated. Their absolute and utter exhaustion is displayed clearly by the pools of sweat underneath them, and the sound of wheezing could be heard from over 50 yards away....