A women married and had 13 kids. Her husband died.

She married again and had 7 more kids. Again, Her husband died. But, she remarried and this time had 5 more children. Alas, she finally died. Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her. He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, "Lord, they're finally together." One mourner leaned over and quietly asked her friend,"What do you think he means her first, second or third husband?" The friend replied, "I think he means her legs."...

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3 boys are bragging about their grandfathers

The first boy said: "My grandpa's mansion is worth a million dollars." While the second said:"Well my grandpa's mansion is worth 5 million, he has a private basketball court and a clubhouse too. " The last one said:" My grandpa's roof is worth 15 million alone... " The other two replied:" Wow, where does your grandpa live?" He replied:"under the overpass of course! "...

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How did the hipster drown?

He went ice skating BEFORE it was cool...

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I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in the cage

Zookeeper said it was bread in captivity...

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A guy walks into a bar...

He sees 2 steaks nailed to the ceiling. He asks the bartender, "What's up with those two steaks?" The bartender replies, "if you can jump up and take those two steaks from the ceiling, I'll give you $1,000,000, if not, I'll cut your arms off." The guy then replies, "I won't do it, the stakes are too high."...

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Why are there so many rivers in France?

Water flows the path of least resistance....

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I gave my friend an elephant to put in his room.

He said "thanks". I said "don't mention it"....

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