"404" sounds pretty fucking high!
Thứ Tư, 24 tháng 10, 2018
American tells to his Russian colleague:
"When Trump passes by, we all swear, spit, and throw rotten fruit on him"
The Russian:
"When Putin passes by, we all piss on him"
The American:
"I exaggerated a little - we swear whispering, spit aside, and while throwing, we don't hit".
The Russian:
"And I exaggerated too - when we piss, we don't take off our pants".
Thứ Ba, 23 tháng 10, 2018
A young ventriloquist puts on a show in a small town
With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes.
Suddenly, a blonde woman from the audience, stands on her chair and starts shouting, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype blonde women that way? What does the color of a woman's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's men like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community, and from reaching our full potential as people. Its people like you that make others think that all blondes are dumb. You and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes but women in general, pathetically all in the name of humor!"
The young ventriloquist visibly embarrassed begins to apologize, and the blonde interrupts yelling, "You stay out of this, Sir. I'm talking to that little shit on your lap."
A joke my second grade teacher used to tell
Every Friday after school, a young boy named Timmy would go to the corner store for an after-school treat.
There would always be a group of rowdy older boys loitering outside the store. Every time Timmy came by they'd pull him aside. The leader would reveal a dollar in his left hand and a quarter in his right, and tell Timmy to take one. Timmy would always take the quarter, leading the boys to laugh and make fun of him.
The store owner, after watching this happen for week after week, finally took Timmy aside one day and explained to him that a dollar was worth more than a quarter, which is why the boys were laughing at him.
Timmy replied, "I know. But if I took the dollar, they'd stop. So far I've made fifty bucks."
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