I must say I would've enjoyed it more if she had no penis at all
Thứ Sáu, 16 tháng 11, 2018
Change in women's requirements towards men by years.
10 years - prince with a castle
15 years - a rock star
20 years - beautiful, smart and rich boy
25 years - a smart and rich man
30 years - a man that cooks and cleans
35 years - a man
40 years - a cat
45 years - two cats
Little Johnny was told by his friends that adults have a deep dark secret and can be easily manipulated.
Johnny decides to test it. He comes home, goes up to his mother and says, "Mom, I know everything." Mom shushes him and gives him $10.
"Just don't tell Dad" she says.
Hey, it's working thinks Little Johnny.
An hour later, Dad comes home from work. Johnny goes up to him and says: "Dad, I know everything."
Dad gives Johnny $100. "Don't tell Mom" he says.
Just then, the mailman knocks on the door. Johnny opens it and says. "I know everything, Mister."
The mailman drops all his mail, his eyes tear up and he says:
"Well then Johnny, come give Daddy a hug."
A captain calls his assistant, "I've got a job for you but first, go to the toilet and jerk off."
The assistant did so and reported back to the captain. Captain said, "Good. How do you feel?" Assistant said, "I feel great sir". Captain said," Good. Now, go back to the toilet and jerk off once more." Assistant did so, this time a bit tired, reported back to the captain.
Captain said, "Good, now take my car keys and drop my daughter home."
One day a man was waking along the beach when he tripped over a lamp.
He turned around and kicked the lamp out of anger. A few seconds later, a genie popped out of the lamp.
Reluctantly, the genie said, "Even though you kicked me, I still have to give you three wishes. However, because of what you did, I will also give twice what you wish for to the person you hate the most: your boss."
So the man agreed and made his first wish. "I want lots of money", he said. Instantly 22 million dollars appeared in the man's bank account and 44 million appeared in his boss' account.
For his second wish, the man wished for a couple of sports cars. Instantly a Lambergini, Ferrari and Porsche appeared. At the same time two of each car appeared outside of his boss' house.
Finally the genie said, "This is your last wish, you should choose carefully," and to this the man replied, "I've always wanted to donate a kidney..."
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