Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Bảy, 15 tháng 12, 2018

A blonde guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting.

"What's up?" he says. "I'm having a heart attack," cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as he's dialing, his 4-year-old son comes up and says,"Daddy! Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got no clothes on!" The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs into the bedroom, past his screaming wife, and rips open the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother, totally naked, cowering on the closet floor. You rotten bastard, "says the husband,"my wife's having a heart attack and you're running around...

Thứ Sáu, 14 tháng 12, 2018

How do you get a nun pregnant?

Dress her up as a choir boy....

Why did the Mexican take a Xanax?

For Hispanic Attack!...

Why does Batman wear Dark clothing?

Batman doesn't want to get shot. Why does Robin wear bright clothing? Batman doesn't want to get shot....

Husband was screwing his secretary up the ass when his wife walked in

Wife: (sobbing) You can't do this to me! Husband: I know that's why I am doing it with her!...

A man is in court. The Judges says,"on the 3rd August you are accused of killing your wife by beating her to death with a hammer, how do you plead?"

"Guilty", said the man in the dock. At this point a man at the back of the court stood up and shouted "You dirty rat!" The Judge asked the man to site down and to refrain from making any noise. The Judge continued "..... and that also on the 17th September you are accused of killing your son by beating him to death with a hammer, how do you plead"? "Guilty", said the man in the dock. Again the same man at the back stood up and shouted even louder, "You dirty rotten stinking rat"!! At this point the Judge called the man to the bench and said, "I...