Rebrand it as a rap song and name it, "Yo Bitch, It's Freezing Outside."
Chủ Nhật, 16 tháng 12, 2018
A wife decides to take her husband, Dave, to a strip club for his birthday.
They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if hes been to this club before.
"Oh no," says Dave. "Hes on my bowling team."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if hed like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"
"Shes in the Ladies Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them."
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"
Daves wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book.
The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave.
Thứ Bảy, 15 tháng 12, 2018
Mating Bull
A man takes his wife to the stock show. As they start heading down the alley that had all the bulls, they come up to the first bull's stall and the sign in the stall read: "This bull mated 50 times last year."
The wife turns to her husband and says, "He mated 50 times in a year. You could learn from him."
They proceed to the next bull and his sign read: "This bull mated 65 times last year."
The wife turns to her husband and says, "This one mated 65 times last year. That is over 5 times a month! You can learn from this one, too."
They proceeded to the last bull whose sign said: "This bull mated 365 times last year."
The wife's mouth drops open and she says, "WOW! This one mated 365 times last year. That's ONCE A DAY!!! You could really learn from this one."
The man turns to his wife and says, "Go up and ask his owner if it was 365 times with the same cow."
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