My wife is pregnant and my doctor asked me if I had ever been present at a childbirth before.

I replied, "Yes just once." The doctor asked, "What was it like?" I said, "It was dark, then suddenly very bright."...

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What nationality is Santa?

North Polish....

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What did the egg say to the boiling water?

It's gonna take me a while to get hard; I got laid earlier today...

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I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked surprised....

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I have a talent where I can see inside wrapped presents

It's a gift....

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Teacher : Why didn't you come to the school yesterday?

Student : My dad is in the hospital 1 week later.. Teacher : Is your dad still in the hospital? Student : Yes, he is a doctor....

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I Read 1,182 Emergency Room Bills This Year. Here's What I Learned

I Read 1,182 Emergency Room Bills This Year. Here's What I Learned A $5,571 bill to sit in a waiting room, $238 eye drops, and a $60 ibuprofen tell the story of how emergency room visits are squeezing patients. December 19, 2018 at 12:32AM via Digg https://ift.tt/2PLTD...

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