Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Funny Video

Funny Video about animals and all around the world! :)

Funny Picture

Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)

Funny Game

Play game and comfortable :)

Funny Funny

Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.

Thứ Ba, 22 tháng 1, 2019

Three men are in a hotel room in Soviet Russia.

The first two men open a bottle of vodka, while the third is tired and goes straight to bed. He is unable to sleep however, as his increasingly drunk friends tell political jokes loudly.

After a while, the tired man gets frustrated and walks downstairs for a smoke. He stops in the lounge and asks the receptionist to bring tea to their room in five minutes.

The man walks back into the room, joins the table, leans towards a power outlet and speaks into it:

"Comrade major, we want some tea to room 62 please."

His friends laugh on the joke, until there is a knock on the door. The receptionist brings a tea pot. His friends fall silent and pale, horrified of what they just witnessed. The party is dead, and the man goes to sleep.

After a good night's rest, the man wakes up, and notices his friends are gone. Surprised, he walks downstairs and asks the receptionist where they went.

The nervous receptionist whispers that KGB came and took them before dawn.

The man is horrified. He wonders why he was spared.

The receptionist responds:

"Well, comrade major did quite like your tea gag."

How do you turn a three dimensional printer into a four dimensional printer?

Just give it time.

I (31m) just had the most uncomfortable experience of my life

Bản tóm tắt này không có sẵn. Vui lòng nhấp vào đây để xem bài đăng.

Thứ Hai, 21 tháng 1, 2019

A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.

She directs him down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton-balls and a ball of string on the counter. The sales girl says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?" He answers, "You see, it's like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling papers; cause it's so much cheaper. So, I figure if I have to roll my own... so does she."

If you like Discord and you like reposts, join the r/jokes Discord server.

Guaranteed reposts.

https://discord.gg/jokes

Recently reached 10k members and 10M reposts.

A student in a psych class is asking his professor about sexual fetishes.

Student: Do you know the scientific names of most of the sexual fetishes?

Prof: I believe I know just about all of them, I’ve been teaching psychology for over 40 years.

Student: well what do you call a person who is aroused by dead people.

Prof: easy, that’s a necrophiliac.

Student: how about someone who is aroused by feces?

Prof: that’s not so common but I believe they call those people coprophiliacs.

Student: Wow, you know a lot. Ok, what about me? I’m aroused by sticking my junk into a bag of cashews. What would you call me?

Prof: well I’d say your fucking nuts.

Two Students from Asia Came to My High School.

They were twins, a guy, Ving, and a girl, Ling. Ving is in my math class, and the dude is like a math wiz. I’m really struggling, so I ask Ving if he’d give me a hand on the homework.

Ving says yeah, he just wants me to do him a favor.

I’m like yeah sure what?

He asks me to drive him to the city hall after school. He says he wants to change his name to something more American.

I’m like alright dude! So after school I’m driving Ling and Ving to the city hall, and Ling is totally giving Ving the cold shoulder. I’m like what’s the deal and Ving explains that his name has been passed down for generations, and Ling is totally pissed that he’d disrespect his ancestry by changing it.

So then we get to the city hall and wait in line for a super long time. Finally it’s our turn and Ving tells me he’s picked “Lee” as his American name. He steps up to the desk and starts filling out some paperwork, and the whole time Ling is scolding him about the ancestry shit, blah blah.

Then it’s time for Ving to sign his name and seal the deal, but suddenly his eyes well up with tears and he says that he can’t do it.

Shittttt man, that ancestry shit runs deeeep.

The lady at the desk is like ok, but Ving has to pay a small fee to cancel his request.

Argh, stupid small town laws, Ling groans as she opens up her purse and starts sifting around for cash.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, some Asian guy bursts through the town hall doors.

“DAD!” Ling and Ving exclaim.

He looked at them and cried, “Don’t stop! Be Lee, Ving. Hold on to that fee, Ling!”