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Thứ Tư, 10 tháng 4, 2019

Two men golfing...

Two guys are trying to get in a quick eighteen holes, but there are two terrible lady golfers in front of them hitting the ball everywhere but where it’s supposed to go.

The first guy says, “Why don’t you go over and ask if we can play through?” The second guy gets about halfway there, turns and comes back.

The first guy says, “What’s wrong?”

He says, “One of them is my wife, and the other one is my mistress.”

The first guy says, “That could be a problem. I’ll go over.”

He gets about halfway there and he turns and comes back, too.

The second guy says, “What’s wrong?”

The first guy says, “Small world.”

While most puns make me feel numb,

mathematics puns make me feel number.

I like you, in a plutonic way.

"Don't you mean 'platonic'?"

No, plutonium, like radioactive exposure, the longer I'm with you the more I feel like dying.

My wife asked me, “Hey, can you give examples of jobs that don’t exist anymore?”

I said, “Steve.”

What is the internal temperature of a Tauntaun?

Luke warm.

A motivational speaker gave blood, what was his blood type?

B-Positive

A friend asked me if I knew anything about 1’s and 0’s

I told him I knew a bit