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Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.

Thứ Ba, 30 tháng 4, 2019

A man and his son are driving past a graveyard.

Suddenly, the son leans forward and asks, "Do they ever bury two people in the same grave?"

Surprised, the man said, "Of course not! Why ask such a question?"

His son replied, well I read a gravestone that read, "Here lies a lawyer and an honest man".

My grandpa always says, “When one door closes, another opens.”

He was a good man, but a lousy cabinet maker.

Son asked his dad “Dad, what is an alcoholic?”

Dad replied “You see those four trees over there? Well an alcoholic would see eight.”

“Dad, I only see two trees”

What do you call a philosopher who's banging a prostitute?

Someone who's deep in thot.

The Stolen Kids Of Sarah Lawrence


The Stolen Kids Of Sarah Lawrence
What happened to the group of bright college students who fell under the sway of a classmate's father?

April 29, 2019 at 09:23PM
via Digg http://bit.ly/2Dy0TdR

A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday. She spends $15,000 and looks sensational. On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”.

’About 32,’ is the reply.’

‘Nope! I’m exactly 50,’ the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald’s and asks the counter girl the very same question.

The girl replies, ‘I’d guess about 29.’ The woman replies with a big smile, ‘Nope, I’m 50.’

Now she’s feeling really good about herself. She stops at a candy shop on her way down the street.

She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the assistant the same burning question.

The clerk responds, ‘Oh, I’d say 30.’

Again she proudly responds, ‘I’m 50, but thank you!’

While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.

He replies, ‘Lady, I’m 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra Then, and only then I can tell you EXACTLY how old you are.’

They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the better of her. She finally blurts out, ‘What the hell, go ahead.’

He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each nipple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other.

After a couple of minutes of this, she says, ‘Okay, okay.....How old am I?’

He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, ‘Madam, you are 50.’

Stunned and amazed, the woman says, ‘That was incredible, how could you tell?’

‘I was behind you at McDonalds’.

I can't take my dog to the park anymore because the ducks keep attacking him.

Guess that's what i get for buying a pure bread dog.