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Thứ Năm, 13 tháng 6, 2019

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping

They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. In the middle of the night Sherlock wakes up Watson and says: “Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you see.” Watson replies with: “I see millions and millions of stars.” Holmes says: “And what do you deduce from that?” Watson thinks for a minute before responding: “Well, if there are millions of stars, and if even a few of those have planets, it’s quite likely there are some planets like earth out there. And if there are a few planets like earth out there, there might also be life." Holmes looks at Watson before responding: “No you idiot, it means somebody stole our tent.”

My friend can't afford his water bill...

So I sent him a "Get well soon" card.

My new girlfriend just told me what her fetish is, but I’m too embarrassed to tell my friends.

But I better get this shit off my chest.

I took the batteries out of my carbon monoxide alarm

Its loud beeping was giving me a headache and making me feel dizzy and sick.

A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack.

Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made.

“Olympic condoms?”, she blurts, “What makes them so special?”

“There are three colors”, he replies, “Gold, Silver and Bronze.”

“What color are you going to wear tonight?”, she asks cheekily. “Gold of course”, says the man proudly.

The wife responds wryly, “Why don’t you wear Silver? It would be nice if you came second for a change.”

Did you know that diarrhea is genetic?

It runs in your jeans.

Scientists Find Mystery Mass Under Moon's Surface


Scientists Find Mystery Mass Under Moon's Surface
The mass of the metal "anomaly" beneath the moon's largest crater is five times greater than the big island of Hawaii.

June 12, 2019 at 08:00AM
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