I bought the president of Brazil an Apple TV for the holiday.

And all he got me was an Amazon fire.

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A shipment of Viagra was hijacked on its way to the depot.

The police are warning citizens to be on the look out for a gang of hardened criminals.

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As the judge sentenced me to death, I tried to offer him a high five.

But he left me hanging.

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When inmates fall in love.

Do the finish each others sentences?

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Why was Pavlov’s hair so messy?

Because he didn’t condition it.

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What's the best time for sex?

8:54 because it's 6 to 9.

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My wife told me that she would smash my face into the keyboard if I didn't stop being misogynist...

And that's when I let her know that I'm the Man of the House, the King of the Castle, the Lord of the Mancjkkf no jskslskf d j.lo alsjdj djdjslai48 err is shwks9ri3jekdo 3irbdjdibsks.

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