Fine. Suture self.
Thứ Sáu, 15 tháng 11, 2019
A man is fired from his job at the pickle factory NSFW
A man comes home from his job at the pickle factory. “Honey, I got fired today for sticking my dick in the pickle slicer.”
Wife: “My God! What’s happened?”
Husband: “She got fired too”
Thứ Năm, 14 tháng 11, 2019
A woman get cheated by on by her husband.
Devastated, she doesn’t know how to continue to live her life.
She heard that there’s a very wise monk who lives up in a mountain, and decide to go there to consult him.
After few days of traveling, walking, climbing, she reach the top and meet the wise monk.
“I have spent my whole life with him, my youth was dedicated to support him, take care of him. And now he left me with a young women. My life is stolen, and I’m left with nothing. I don’t know what to do”.
The monk gives her a cookie and asks her to eat it. After she finishes eating, he asks: “Is the cookie delicious?”
“Yes”- she answer.
“Do you want another one?”
“Sure, please”.
The monk looked her in the eyes and said “Do you see the problem now?”
The woman thinks for a while, and then slowly speaks, “I guess human nature is greedy. You got one, then you want more, maybe a new one, bigger one. It’s never enough. And nothing lasts forever, anything is impermanence. We should be aware and not disappointed for that”.
The monk shake his head “No, I mean you are too fat, you should eat less.
A guy dials his home phone number from work.
A strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?"
"This is the maid.", answered the woman.
"We don't have a maid!"
"I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house."
"Well, this is her husband. Is she there?"
"Ummm...she's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband."
The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?"
"What do I have to do?"
"I want you to get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she's with."
The maid puts down the phone. The guy hears footsteps, followed by a couple of gunshots.
The maid comes back to the phone. "What should I do with the bodies?"
"Throw them in the swimming pool!"
"What pool?"
"Uh.. is this 832-4173?"
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