on her inner thigh. If you put your ear to it, you can smell the ocean.
Thứ Sáu, 29 tháng 11, 2019
How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two.
One to change the bulb, and one to hold the penis.
Edit: *Father
Edit: * LADDER!!!! Dammit.
Interviewer: How do you explain this 4 year gap on your resume?
Me: That's when I went to Yale.
Interviewer: Thats pretty impressive. You're hired.
Me: Thank you, I really need this Yob.
A man is driving along a dusty old back road when he sees a sign that says, "Sisters of Mercy House of Prostitution."
A man is driving along a dusty old back road when he sees a sign that says, "Sisters of Mercy House of Prostitution."
Barely believing his eyes, he turns into an old truck stop - and sure enough - there's a big neon sign that says "Sisters of Mercy House of Prostitution."
He knocks and a wizened old nun opens the door.
"$50 bucks to get fucked in here," she says.
The man forks over the money and runs inside. He goes down a long hallway and comes to another door. He knocks and a moderately attractive nun answers.
"$100 to get fucked by the Sisters of Mercy, friend."
He hands over the cash, runs through the door, down another hallway, and knocks on the door at the end.
A stunningly beautiful nun opens the door and says, "$500, best fucking of your life, just through here."
The man hands over the money, runs through the door and finds himself outside. The door slams shut behind him, and above the door he sees a sign.
"You have just been fucked by the Sisters of Mercy House of Prostitution."
A man has a defective clock and takes it to the German workshop.
The guy says, "My clock is busted. Instead of the usual 'tick tock' it goes 'tick tick tick'. Can you fix this?"
The German shop owner says, "I see. Follow me."
The owner leads the man into a dark ominous room and places the clock on a wooden chair and straps it. He then proceeds to light up a single lamp in front of them.
He then says in a sinister voice, " Ve hav vays of making you tock"
A man walks into a bar
He sits down and orders 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks “Rough day?” The guy responds “I just found out my brother is gay and is dating my best friend.” The next day the guy goes back to the bar and orders 20 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks “what happened this time?” The guy responds “I just found out my son is also gay” The next day the guy goes in and orders 30 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks “Does anyone in your family like women?” The guy responds “apparently my wife does”
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