But hay, it’s in my jeans.
Thứ Năm, 5 tháng 12, 2019
"Forgive me father, for I have sinned"
Girl: "Forgive me father for I have sinned."
Priest: "What have you done my child?"
Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."
Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"
Girl: "Because he touched my hand."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)
Girl: "Yes father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call a man a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he touched my breast."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)
Girl: "Yes father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he took off my clothes, father."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he takes off her clothes)
Girl: "Yes father."
Priest: "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "Then he stuck his you know what into my you know where."
Priest: "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know what into her you know where) Girl: "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES FATHER!!!" Priest: (after a few minutes): "That's no reason to call him a son of a bitch."
Girl: "But father he had AIDS!"
Priest: "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"
Sorry, my 4y old brother wanted me to tell this joke here
Him: Knock, knock
Me: Who's there?
Him: Idiot
Me: Idiot who?
Him: IDIOT YOU!!
He probably doesn't understand downvotes so I will have no Karma left after this
Thứ Tư, 4 tháng 12, 2019
A little boy sees his grandpa smoking weed.
He says, "Gramps, can I have a puff?" Grandpa replies, "Can your dick touch your asshole?"
"No..."
"Well, you can't have any."
Later, the little boy sees his Grandpa drinking beer and asks, "Can I have a swig?" Grandpa replies again, "Can your dick touch your asshole?"
"No..."
"Well, you can't have any."
The goes into the kitchen and is eating cookies when his Grandpa walks in.
"Can I have a cookie?", asks Grandpa.
"Can your dick touch your asshole?"
Grandpa says, "As a matter of fact, it can!"
The little boy replies, "Well then you can go fuck yourself. These are MY cookies."
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