It's nice to have some company
Thứ Ba, 21 tháng 1, 2020
A woman is deciding between three suitors which one to be with. She says to the three men, "we are still young and inexperienced, go out there and travel around the world, we'll see when you come back."
So the first guy goes to Europe and tours the different countries there.
The second guy goes to Europe, then Asia, then Africa, then Australia and basically goes everywhere.
The third guy doesn't go anywhere.
6 months later they all meet up and the first guy says, "I went to all the countries in Europe and have become more cultured after visiting all their historic sites.
The second guy says, "I went to Europe and became more cultured, Asia and learned martial arts, Africa and fed starving children and Australia and fought a stingray, and survived. It cost me $400k but it was well worth it and is only a drop in the bucket to me."
The third guy who didn't go anywhere walks around the woman once, stops in front of her and takes hold of the woman's hands, "I've just traveled around the whole world, because you are my whole world."
Upon hearing this, the woman became emotional and with tears of happiness running down her face , she says, "That is by far the sweetest thing I've ever heard in my entire life. “
After this man spoke such sweet words. She was finally ready to make her the obvious choice...
She then choice the second guy, the one with the most money.
Thứ Hai, 20 tháng 1, 2020
An Irish daughter (an oldie but goodie)
An Irish daughter had not been to the house for over five years. Upon her return, her father cussed her out, "Where have you been all this time, you ingrate! Why didn't you write us, not even a line to let us know how you were doing? Why didn't you call? You little tramp! Don't you know what you put your Mum through??!!"
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff... Dad... I became a prostitute..."
The father was furious. "WHAT!!? Out of here, you shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family - I don't ever want to see you again!"
"OK Dad, as you wish." the daughter replied. "I just came back to give Mum this luxury fur coat, title deeds to a ten bed-roomed mansion, plus a savings account certificate for £5 million. For my little brother, this gold Rolex, and for you Daddy the spanking new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a lifetime membership to the Country Club. And I have an invitation for you all to spend New Years' Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera, and...."
The father stopped her, "Now what was it you said you had become?"
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff... A prostitute Dad!"
"Oh! Sweet Jesus!" he replied, "You scared me half to death, girl! I thought you said 'a Protestant.' Come here and give your old man a hug!"
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