I wish I could be ugly for just 1 day

Because being ugly every day sucks... :(

Read More

When does 1 + 1 = 3?

When you don't pull out.

Read More

My wife screamed in pain during labour

I asked, “What’s wrong?”.

She screamed. “These contractions are killing me!!”

“I am sorry, honey.” I replied. “What is wrong?”

Read More

Did you know that a group of crows is called a murder?

Well, technically it’s only a murder if there’s probable caws.

Read More

You're so ugly that I'm going to have to stop drinking

just in case I start seeing two of you...

​

Read More

I walked in on my wife on the scale.

She didn't look pleased so I said "suck in your stomach!"

She quickly replied, "that's not going to help"

I retorted, "it might let you see the numbers"

Read More

So my nephew just wanted to know...

Have you heard the joke about the balloon that met the cactussssssssssssh

Read More