Husband: Emphatic no, five letters.
Wife: Never
H: Pistol, 3 letters.
W: Gun
H: Disgust, 3 letters.
W: Ugh
H: Charity, 4 letters.
W: Give
H: Female sheep, 3 letters
W: Ewe
H: Pixar movie, 2 letters
W: Up
Thứ Ba, 26 tháng 5, 2020
What did the redditor say after robbing a jewellery store?
Edit:OMG thanks for the silver
Edit 2:WTF OMG thanks for the gold
EDIT 3:OMFG THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE PLATINUM
A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?"
The horse, incapable of understanding human language, promptly shits on the floor and leaves
A priest is walking to his church when he passes a group of prostitutes.
One of them yells out “$20 for a blowjob, Father!” The priest puts his head down and speed walks the rest of the way. When he arrives at the church he nervously approaches one of the nuns and asks her “Sister, what’s a blowjob?” She tells him “$20, Same as downtown”
Vladimir Putin is hosting a summit with Donald Trump, Kim Jong-Un, and Justin Trudeau.
As a part of the summit, Putin takes the three leaders to a wilderness area outside of Moscow and dismisses the press corps, and a large wolf in a cage is brought out.
"Friends, this savage wolf was trapped and brought from the wilds of Siberia just yesterday. I want to show you what kind of man I am."
Putin takes a pencil and puts it behind his ear. Then he unzips his pants and underwear, and stands there butt naked in front of the three world leaders.
"Now, witness the strength of Russia."
He puts his stuff through the bars of the cage, and the wolf starts licking his balls. After a few minutes, the wolf starts to nibble with his teeth.. Putin endures it for several seconds, and then when the wolf finally latches on to his penis, he grabs the pencil from behind his ear and pokes the wolf in the eye with the eraser. As the wolf yelps, Putin pulls his package out from the cage and gets dressed.
"And that, gentlemen," Putin says as the gets over the pain, "is the strength and power of Russia. Now, show me what your nations are made of. Supreme Leader?"
Kim Jong-Un smiles and laughs and says, "No thank you, Mr. President, My, uh... wife would never forgive me."
Putin laughs politely and shrugs his shoulders. He then looks to Trudeau. "Mr. Trudeau? Canada has native wolves, show us the strength of Canada!"
The Prime Minister looks abashed. "Eh... no, no thank you, sir."
This time Putin can't withhold his grin. He finally turns to Donald Trump.
"Surely, the world's greatest superpower has a leader of great power! Show us the power of the United States of America!"
"I'll tell you what, Vlad, as I call you, I don't mind doing it, I'll be great at doing it, the very best. Just do me a favor, there's no need to poke me in the eye."
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