A farmer's son joins reddit and finds the r/Jokes subreddit

"Father, father!" he says to the farmer, "This subreddit is amazing! It's full of so many good jokes, I wish I could be just as funny as all the redditors I've seen."

The farmer laughs at his son and tells him, "Son, if you really want to be like the redditors on r/Jokes you'll have to first sow your Ohsts."

His son looks at him, perplexed. "What on earth are 'Ohsts'? I've never seen you with those."

"I know you've heard the saying 'you reap what you sow', and the same saying applies reddit," the farmer tells his son.

"Those redditors just sow their Ohsts so they can reap Ohst, reap Ohst, and reap Ohst."

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Flying the Confederate flag doesn’t make you a racist.

It’s usually the other way around.

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One of my great grandfather’s favorite jokes...

A guys walking down the street with a bag of rabbit droppings he runs into one of his friends who asks what’s in the bag. Guy says “Smart Pills,” his friend says “Gimme one of them Smart Pills,” then reaches in the bag and pops a handful of them in his mouth. He looks at the guy and says “These smart pills taste like shit,” guy says “You’re getting smarter already.”

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What's the wifi password?

Bartender: You need to buy a drink first.

Me: Okay, I'll have a coke.

Bartender: Is Pepsi okay?

Me: Sure. How much is that?

Bartender: $3

Me: There you go. So, what's the wifi password?

Bartender: You need to buy a drink first. No spaces, all lowercase.

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I tell it in the wrong order.

Why am i bad at telling jokes?

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Did you know that camels can last longer without water than sex?

They can go three weeks without water, but can't go a day without a hump.

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One d‌‌ay i‌‌n t‌‌he c‌‌hicken c‌‌oop t‌‌he f‌‌armer d‌‌rops o‌‌ff a‌‌ n‌‌ew, y‌‌oung, s‌‌trong r‌‌ooster f‌‌rom t‌‌he m‌‌arket.

T‌‌he n‌‌ew c‌‌ocky r‌‌ooster t‌‌ells t‌‌he o‌‌ld r‌‌ooster, "‌‌This i‌‌s m‌‌y c‌‌oop n‌‌ow, a‌‌nd t‌‌hese a‌‌re m‌‌y h‌‌ens!"

T‌‌he o‌‌ld r‌‌ooster t‌‌ells h‌‌im, "‌‌Fine, i‌‌f y‌‌ou c‌‌an b‌‌eat m‌‌e i‌‌n a‌‌ r‌‌ace a‌‌round t‌‌he f‌‌arm, i‌‌t's a‌‌ll y‌‌ours."

T‌‌he y‌‌oung r‌‌ooster t‌‌hinks, "‌‌I'll g‌‌ive h‌‌im h‌‌is l‌‌ittle r‌‌ace b‌‌ut a‌‌fter I‌‌ a‌‌m k‌‌icking h‌‌im o‌‌ut n‌‌o m‌‌atter w‌‌hat."

S‌‌o t‌‌he t‌‌wo r‌‌oosters t‌‌ake o‌‌ff a‌‌round t‌‌he f‌‌arm, a‌‌t f‌‌irst t‌‌he y‌‌oung r‌‌ooster i‌‌s i‌‌n t‌‌he l‌‌ead b‌‌ut w‌‌hen t‌‌hey g‌‌et t‌‌o t‌‌he f‌‌armer's h‌‌ouse t‌‌he o‌‌ld r‌‌ooster b‌‌ursts a‌‌head. T‌‌hen s‌‌uddenly... "‌‌BLAM" t‌‌he f‌‌armer s‌‌hoots t‌‌he y‌‌oung r‌‌oosters h‌‌ead r‌‌ight o‌‌ff.

"‌‌God D‌‌ammit! T‌‌hat's t‌‌he t‌‌hird g‌‌ay r‌‌ooster i‌‌ b‌‌ought f‌‌rom t‌‌hat d‌‌amn m‌‌arket t‌‌his w‌‌eek!"

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