Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Hai, 20 tháng 7, 2020

I was watching a porno and it was just this fat dude crying and jerking off

then I realised I hadn't turned my computer on yet...

The nun teaching Sunday School was speaking to her class one morning and she asked the question: "When you die and go to Heaven... which part of your body goes first?"

Suzy raised her hand and said "I think it's your hands.” "Why do you think it's your hands, Suzy?" Suzy replied "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together in front of you and God just takes your hands first.” “What a wonderful answer!" the nun said. Little Johnny raised his hand and said "Sister, I think it's your feet.” The nun looked at him with the strangest look on her face. "Now Johnny, why do you think it would be your feet?" Little Johnny said "Well, I walked into mommy and daddy’s bedroom the other night. Mommy had her legs straight...

These times are harder on people with disabilities.

My dwarf friend is struggling to put food on the table...

A s‌‌ixteen y‌‌ear-old b‌‌oy c‌‌ame h‌‌ome w‌‌ith a‌‌ b‌‌rand n‌‌ew F‌‌ord F‌‌150.

His p‌‌arents l‌‌ook a‌‌t t‌‌he t‌‌ruck a‌‌nd a‌‌sk, "‌‌Where d‌‌id y‌‌ou g‌‌et t‌‌hat t‌‌ruck?!" "I b‌‌ought i‌‌t t‌‌oday," h‌‌e s‌‌ays. "With w‌‌hat m‌‌oney?" s‌‌ays h‌‌is m‌‌other. They k‌‌new w‌‌hat a‌‌ n‌‌ew F‌‌150 c‌‌ost. "Well," h‌‌e s‌‌ays, "‌‌this o‌‌ne c‌‌ost m‌‌e j‌‌ust f‌‌ifteen d‌‌ollars." The f‌‌ather l‌‌ooks a‌‌t h‌‌im l‌‌ike h‌‌e's c‌‌razy. "Who w‌‌ould s‌‌ell a‌‌ t‌‌ruck l‌‌ike t‌‌hat f‌‌or f‌‌ifteen d‌‌ollars?" h‌‌e s‌‌ays. "It w‌‌as t‌‌he l‌‌ady u‌‌p t‌‌he s‌‌treet," s‌‌ays t‌‌he b‌‌oy. "‌‌I d‌‌on't k‌‌now h‌‌er n‌‌ame -‌‌ t‌‌hey...

I recently bought my pet duck a mask, to protect it from corona virus...

It’s nothing flashy, but it fits the bill...

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase.

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He says, “What are you doing?” She answers, “I’m moving to New York. I heard prostitutes there get paid $100 for doing what I do for you for free!” Later that night, while on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he’s going, he replies, “I’m going to New York, too. I want to see you live on $200 a year!...

I feel bad for children of gay couples.

They either suffer twice as many dad jokes or an endless cycle of ask your mother....