It’s not stroganoff.
Chủ Nhật, 2 tháng 8, 2020
Oh, April!
Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.
One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"
When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.
"GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.
A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour?"
April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.
"JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good," and April fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?"
And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.
This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT FUCKING THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!"
The Teacher fainted.
How many watermelons can you carry?
A teacher in the 1st grade asks pupils: "How many watermelons can you carry?"
"I can carry one," little Annie says
"And how would you carry it?"
"I would hold it in both hands!"
"Good! Would anyone carry more?"
Little Maggie raises her hand: "I would carry two!"
"Okay, how would you do it?"
"I would put one under the left arm, and the second one under my right arm!"
"Excellent! I doubt anyone can carry more"
Little Tony disagrees: "I can carry three!"
"Oh? And how would you do it?"
"I'd put one under the left arm, one under the right arm, and I would spike the third one on my willy"
"Oh, that's inappropriate, Tony! Class, let's move on to another question!"
"Mrs. Teacher, I can carry five!" says little Johnny.
Teacher is very suspicious but the curiosity takes over: "Oh dear, how would you do that?"
"I'd put one under the left arm, one under the right arm, and I would spike Tony on my willy."
He's not even your father.
Son: dad, I wanna marry that girl in the apartment below us.
Dad: don't, I had a relationship with her mom. I'm afraid she turns out to be your sister.
Son: thenlet me marry the one in thr apartment above us.
Dad: forget that one too, I had it with her mom. I'm afraid she turns out to be your sister.
Son: how about the one across from us? Dad: same thing.
Son gets mad, goes to his mom and tells her the story.
His mom says, "fuck him". Go marry whoever you want. He's not even your father.
Wife: I am leaving you
Husband : is it because I speak so quietly
Wife: you asshole you could at least say something
Đăng ký:
Bài đăng (Atom)