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Thứ Năm, 20 tháng 8, 2020
A prisoner slipped on the stairs 5 years into his 14 year sentence.
He suffered some minor injuries but he decided to pretend to be in a coma for rest of his sentence.
When he finally decided to drop the act on the last day of his sentence, the warden arrested him again, because you aren't supposed to end a sentence with a coma.
Why did I get divorced?
Why did I get divorced?
Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday.
As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said.
She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.
Thứ Tư, 19 tháng 8, 2020
A Boob, a Vagina and an Asshole are debating who is the greatest of the three of them.
Boob: I give milk to new born babies and I'm attractive to the
opposite sex, that's why I am the greatest.
Vagina: That's nothing.
I give birth to babies, and can accommodate the opposite sex.
That's why I'm the greatest.
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