Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Hai, 21 tháng 9, 2020

Grandma is eighty-eight years old and still drives her own car. She writes:

Dear Grand-daughter, The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and saw a "Honk" if you love Jesus' bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting. So, I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper. Boy, am I glad I did; what an uplifting experience that followed. I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good he is, and I didn't notice that the light had changed. It...

A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest...

“I almost had an affair with another woman." The priest said, "What do you mean, almost?" The Irishman said, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped." The priest said, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You’re not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary’s and put $50 in the poor box." The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying,...

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to your lock calmly.

Because communication is key....

Poop jokes aren’t my favourite kind of joke.

But they are a solid #2....

Bill Gates woke up in the morning and found that his Mexican housekeepers were gone.

He asked his wife Melinda where they went, who replied that Steve Jobs showed up earlier and offered them the same work at his mansion for double their previous wage. Bill became furious. "Fucking Jobs, coming here and taking our immigrants!"...

Procrastination is a lot like masturbation..

If feels nice at the time, but ultimately you’re just fucking yourself...

What does Tarzan falling to his death have in common with Millenials?

I miss Vine....