FunnyStory about animals and all around the world
Funny Video about animals and all around the world! :)
Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)
Play game and comfortable :)
Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.
The man replied, “There are three reasons.
One, I love to play with my money.
Two, when I play with my money, I love to see it grow.
Three, and this is the most important of all, the next time my wife wants to blow fifty bucks, she won’t have to leave the house!”
Probably a massive stomachache.
What, you didn’t think I would make a pie joke on my cake day did you??
He sits down at the counter and asks for a beer.
“That will be 5.98$, sir.”, the bartender says.
The man, puts his hand into his pocket and pulls out 5 dollars and 98 cents in exact change.
“How much will it cost to buy everyone here a round of drinks?”, the man asks, taking a sip of his drink.
“That would cost 257.54$, sir.”, the bartender says, looking at the register.
“Let everyone have a round of drinks on me.”, the man replied, pulling out exactly 257 dollars and 54 cents out of his pocket. “And while you’re at it, get a bowl of water for my donkey and ostrich.”
Everyone in the bar is cheering as they get a free drink.
Looking at their reaction, the man goes “Eh, fuck it. What is the total tab of all these people in the bar?”
“3325.79$, sir.”, the bartender asks after adding up all active tabs in the bar.
The man puts his hand in his pocket and pulls out a huge stack of bills and some coins and hands it over without even counting them.
After counting it, the bartender finds that the man handed over exactly 3325.79$.
Now curious, he asks the man “How is it that you are able to pull out the exact amount of money needed every time? Are you some magician?”
“I’ll tell you if you can keep it a secret.” the stranger replies.
“Of course”, the bartender says.
“Well, this happened around a year ago, I was walking by the street next to my house and tripped over something. I looked back to see what had nearly made me fall and saw that it was a lamp, all shiny and golden.”
“Suddenly, a puff of smoke clouded my vision, when I could see again, there was a genie there!”
“He said ‘Now that you have made me free I shall grant you wishes three.’ Now, the most important thing in the world right now is money, and I thought to just ask for a large sum of money. I thought about it a little, I realised that just asking for a large sum of money straight up is kind of stupid, it would be hard to manage and it would look very suspicious in my bank account.”
“I thought about it a little more and decided to ask that whenever I put my hand in my pocket, I will always have the exact amount of money I need for that situation in it. This way, I have seemingly infinite money without the hassles of carrying it around and risking it being stolen.”
The bartender, now impressed at his way of thinking, says “Wow, you seem really smart, I never would have thought of that. You found a creative way to get the benefits of infinite money without any of the dangers.”
“If your first wish was so ingenious, you surely must have asked for something equally clever for your other two wishes. So what did you ask for using your last two wishes?”, the bartender asks.
The man replies, “A chick with long legs and a big ass.”
What do you do if you see an Epileptic having a fit in the bath?
Throw in your laundry.
The guy behind us leaned over and said "I think that's disgusting. My son died in the bath whilst having a fit."
We both went white and apologised. The guy got up to get off and said, "he choked on a sock."