Because there’s not a single person there.
Thứ Năm, 22 tháng 10, 2020
A man's wife sends him out to get some cigarettes
So he walks down to the nearby store only to find that it's closed. He goes into a nearby bar to use the vending machine. While at the bar he sees a beautiful woman and starts talking to her. They have a couple of beers together, and then one thing leads to another and they end up in her apartment.
After they've had their fun, he realizes that its 3AM and says, "Oh no, its so late, my wife's going to kill me. Have you got any talcum powder?" She gives him some talcum powder, which he proceeds to rub on his hands and then he leaves. When he arrives home, his wife is waiting for him and she is pretty pissed.
"Where the hell have you been?!" she asks. "Well, honey, it's like this. I went to the store like you asked, but they were closed. So I went to the bar to use the vending machine. I saw this great looking chick there and we had a few drinks and one thing led to another and I ended up in bed with her." "Oh yeah? Let me see your hands!"
She sees his hands are covered with powder and... "You liar!! You went bowling again!!"
A librarian was organizing her books when a man in a dark suit walked up.
"Hey, I'm Steven. I'll pay you $20000 if you show me your nipples tomorrow."
The librarian was shocked. $20000 was a solid 6 months of work. Dumbfounded, she nodded her head. Steven then left without a word of acknowledgement.
That night, the librarian had a lot trouble falling asleep.
The next day, the librarian was minding her own business, when Steven came through the front door. With him came another man that was carrying a large suitcase.
Steven came up, leaned over, and said, "Well?"
The librarian pulled up her shirt and bra in one fluid motion and proudly showcased her breasts. The other man gasped, then promptly fell to the floor. Steven picked up the man's suitcase, opened it, and pulled out a large wad of cash. He placed the cash in front of the librarian.
"What's up with him?", The librarian asked, looking at the unconscious man.
"I bet him $100000 that you would show me your boobs", said Steven.
A nun, a hot blonde, a German and a Frenchman are sitting in a train compartment.
They don‘t know each other and are minding their own business. The train drives into a tunnel and it gets so dark in the compartment that you could not see your own hand in front of your eyes.
Suddenly a violently loud slapping noise rips into the silence. When the train leaves the tunnel everyone can see that the Frenchman is rubbing his cheek twisted with pain. Since they couldn‘t see what exactly happened, there is nothing but awkward silence and everyone just makes up his own mind on the matter.
The nun thinks to herself: „Almighty! That lusty Frenchman saw his chance to inappropriately touch that blonde woman and consequently she slapped his face. May god forgive them both!“
The hot blonde thinks to herself: „Oh. My. Gawd. That French bastard must have tried to touch my t*ts but accidentally groped the nun because he couldn’t see. But it seems like she took the proper revenge! You go girl!“
The Frenchman thinks to himself: „Mon Dieu! That German bastard groped the blonde woman while it was dark and then she accidentally slapped ME for it!“
The German guy thinks: „Perfekt! In ze next tunnel I‘ll slap ze French guy again!“
Note: I realise that a joke like this has been posted before but in my opinion it was never told right / dragged out long enough. I also apologise for any mistakes, English is only my second language...
Thứ Tư, 21 tháng 10, 2020
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