When every American knows that America is the best country in the world.
Thứ Tư, 25 tháng 11, 2020
Thứ Ba, 24 tháng 11, 2020
Henry
Henry died in a fire and his body was burned pretty bad.
The Morgue needed someone to identify the body, so they sent for his two best friends, Pat and Mike. The three men had always done everything together.
Pat arrived first, and when the mortician pulled back the sheet, Pat said, “Yep, his face is burned up pretty bad. You better roll him over.”
The mortician rolled him over and Pat said, “Nope, ain’t Henry”.
The mortician thought this was rather strange. So he brought Mike in to confirm the identity of the body.
Mike looked at the body and said. “Yup he’s pretty well burnt up. Roll him over”.
The mortician rolled him over and Mike said, No, it ain’t Henry”.
The mortician asked, “How can you tell?”
Mike said, “Well, Henry had two assholes”.
“What? He had two assholes?” asked the mortician.
“Yup, we never seen ‘em, but everybody used to say: There’s Henry with them two assholes”.
An English man meets a Chinese woman in his travels...
They fall in love and live a happy life in England. The woman, however cannot speak in English and has to have her husband translate for her. One day, the man was rather busy and asked his wife to make duck breast. She goes to the butcher but then realizes she doesn’t know how to tell him what she wants. As she’s about to leave in embarrassment, she comes upon an idea. She points at her breasts, and the butcher understands, giving her the duck breast. On the next day, seeing how the previous day turned out, the man asked the woman to go to the butcher to get chicken legs. When she gets there, after a bit of thinking, raises her skirt and points at her thighs. The butcher gets the message and gives her the chicken legs. On the next day, the man asked the woman to go to the butcher to get sausages. Unable to think of anything, she decides to bring her husband to the butcher with her.
Upon arriving, the husband says ‟I’d like some sausages please”.
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