FunnyStory about animals and all around the world
Funny Video about animals and all around the world! :)
Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)
Play game and comfortable :)
Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.
Maid: "I'd like a raise."
Mrs. Smith:"Why do you think you deserve a raise?
Maid:"Three reasons. First, I can cook better than you."
Mrs. Smith:"Who told you that?"
Maid:"Your husband. Second, I clean better than you."
Mrs. Smith:"Who told you that?"
Maid:"Your husband.Third, I'm better in bed than you are."
Mrs. Smith:"I suppose my husband said that too?"
Maid:"No, the gardener."
Mrs. Smith:"How much do you want?"
‟I should be in charge,” said the brain , ‟Because I run all the body‘s systems, so without me nothing would happen.”
‟I should be in charge,” said the blood , ‟Because I circulate oxygen all over so without me you‘d waste away.”
‟I should be in charge,” said the stomach,‟ Because I process food and give all of you energy.”
‟I should be in charge,” said the legs, ‟because I carry the body wherever it needs to go.”
‟I should be in charge,” said the eyes, ‟Because I allow the body to see where it goes.”
‟I should be in charge,” said the rectum, ‟Because Im responsible for waste removal.”
All the other body parts laughed at the rectum And insulted him, so in a huff, he shut down tight. Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery, and the blood Was toxic. They all decided that the rectum should be the boss
The Moral of the story? Even though the others do all the work.... The ass hole is usually in charge
Tom finally decided to tie the knot with his longtime girlfriend. One evening, after the honeymoon, he was cleaning one of his hot rods for an upcoming show.
His wife was standing there at the bench watching him. After a long period of silence she finally speaks. ‟Honey, I’ve just been thinking, now that we’re married maybe it is time you quit spending all your time out here in the garage and you probably should just consider selling all your cars.
Tom gets this horrified look on his face. She says, ”Darling, what’s wrong?‟
”There for a minute you were starting to sound like my ex-wife.‟
”Ex-wife!‟, she screams, ”YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU WERE MARRIED BEFORE!!!!!!!‟
Tom’s reply: ”I wasn’t‟.
S: ‟My grandma was arriving at the train station so i was centimeter”
T: ‟No, no, that‘s ‘Sent to meet her‘. Okay, try another one. Use ‘contagious‘ in a sentence please”
S: ‟I had to wait at the train station for hours because it took that contagious!”