Once, in a Blue Moon.
Thứ Năm, 7 tháng 1, 2021
A man walks into a bar in Vegas.
A man walks into a bar in Vegas.
He has a parrot with him. This parrot is wholly remarkable; it is fluent in Spanish, French and English. So, being a betting man- they're all betting men down in Vegas -he goes up to the bartender and tells him, "I'll bet you this here bird can speak Spanish."
The bartender knows this type, and slams his hand down on the counter with a $10 bill. "You're on! Let's see it."
So the man turned to the bird and asks, "Hablas Espanol?"
The bird is silent as a stone.
"Well, watch this, then, he can speak French too. Parlez-vous Francais?"
The parrot remains silent. The man is sweating through his jacket, and the bartender is chuckling derisively. "Hand over the cash, sir, and have a nice night."
As he walks dejectedly out of the bar, the man turns to the parrot. "You jerk!", he cries. "You cost me ten bucks!"
The parrot, taken aback, ruffles his feathers arrogantly. "Cost you? Buddy, I just made you a fortune! Think of the odds you can get there tomorrow!"
A hungry traveller stopped at a monastery.
He was taken to the kitchen where there was a brother frying chips.
“Are you the friar?” he asked.
The brother replied, “No, I'm the chip monk.”
Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times and she won't believe you.
Tell a woman she's fat once and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.
Thứ Tư, 6 tháng 1, 2021
My girlfriend told me "I used to be Christian"
"That's fine" I replied "I don't see why that would bother me"
"Good" She said "because I'm so much happier as Christina"
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