She got mad and said she is never playing Scrabble with me again!
Chủ Nhật, 17 tháng 1, 2021
A bus filled with politicians is speeding down a country road when it swerves into a field and hits a tree.
The farmer who owns the field and tree comes out to investigate. Then he digs a hole and buries the politicians. A few days later the sheriff drives by and sees the bus. He goes and gets the farmer and asks him where the politicians are. He says he buried them. The sheriff asks if they were all dead. The farmer says, "Some of them were but some of them were trying to tell me they weren't. But you know how politicians lie!"
A Russian joke my grandmother once told me. I hope it works in English.
A man sits at the deathbed of his mother-in-law. She suffers very much and cries in agony: "Oh I'm dying!" "It hurts" "I'm gonna die soon" She stops for a seconds and says: "Well at least the weather is nice today"
The man says: "hey dear, don't get distracted!"
A man walked into a bar and sat down, ordered a beer and drank it until suddenly he heard a voice.
Voice: Nice tie.
The man looked around. Nobody was there except him and the bartender.
Voice: Really cool shirt, too.
The man was concerned. He thought he must be losing his mind.
Voice: I like your hair like that!
Finally concerned, the man said to the bartender, "I keep hearing this voice."
The bartender replied, “Those are the peanuts, sir. They're complimentary.”
A guy walks into a hindu bakery...
The guy said, "tomorrow's my girlfriend's birthday, but I'm a bit short on cash, what's your cheapest cake?"
Baker responded, "come back tomorrow, and I'll have one ready for you at no cost."
Skeptical, the guy almost didn't return. But the next day he was passing by and walked in. The baker went to the back room, and brought out the most beautiful, multi-tiered, lavender cake he'd ever seen. He handed it to the guy, who then pulled out all the money he had in his pocket and offered it to the baker. "No need to pay me, this is my gift to you" said the baker.
"Why in the world would you do this?" asked the guy.
"Because cake day is the best day to earn karma!"
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