How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?

It depends on whether you'll see them later or in a while.

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Why don't blind people go skydiving?

It scares the shit out of their dogs.

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What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Slow down and possibly use a lubricant.

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What's the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?

The first is a super hero, the other is simply a command.

PS: It's a joke, women are awesome.

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What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4k?

HDMI

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So I called Gamestop's customer service line...

and they said "Please Hold."

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What is a Karen called in Europe?

An American

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