I called the tinnitus helpline...

...but it just kept ringing.

(I actually suffer from tinnitus myself, but had a chuckle anyway.)

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If H2O is on the inside of a fire hydrant...What's on the out side?

K9P

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I’m glad # is not called pound anymore.

Otherwise, the #metoo movement would be sending the wrong message.

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It's my special day today but I can't think of any good jokes...

It's a shame, I thought it would be a piece of cake.

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In America police dogs are K9

In China they are E10.

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Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar...

It can't be a coincidence.

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A smart drunk

“I was in the mood for a drink so I biked to the local liquor store to buy a bottle of whiskey. At first I was planning to bike home with the bottle in my bike basket but I’m not an idiot and knew it would break if I crashed so I drank it in the parking lot. Thank god I did because I crashed 12 times on the way home.”

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