"Mum, today I saw my classmate's penis at school, it was like a peanut"
"Oh dear, was it that small?"
"No, it was too salty"
Chủ Nhật, 14 tháng 2, 2021
Silent H
One day, I asked my English Teacher, "Why do we ignore some letters in pronunciation eg. the letter H ...in Hour, Honour. ...etc. ...?????? My English Teacher said, " We are not ignoring them; they're considered silent "....... (I was even more confused .....?????) During the lunch break, my Teacher gave me her packed lunch and asked me to heat it in the Cafeteria. I ate all the food and returned her the empty container. ....!!!!!!! My English Teacher : What happened? I told you to go and HEAT my food, you are returning me an empty container. I replied, "sir, I thought 'H' was silent.
Sex After Death
A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there was sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no after-life at all.
After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact. “Judy, Judy.”
“Is that you, George?"
"Yes, I've come back like we agreed."
"That's wonderful!? What's it like?"
“Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch, you'd be proud, lots of greens. Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much-needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again.”
“Oh, George, are you in Heaven?"
"No, I'm a rabbit in Kansas."
My wife came up to me the other day and said "Do these jeans make me look fat?"
I said "Do you promise not to get mad at me no matter what I say?"
"Yes"
"Okay, I fucked your sister."
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