Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Bảy, 27 tháng 2, 2021

What do you get when you cross Prince Charles and the Queen?

Murdered in a tunnel in France...

There was a man who had 3 girlfriends, but he did not know which one to marry. So he decided to give each one $5000 and see how each of them spent it.

The first 1 went out and got a total makeover with the money. She got new clothes, a new hairdo, manicure, pedicure, the works, and tells the man, "I spent the money so I could look pretty for you because I love you so much." The 2nd one went out and bought new golf clubs, a Dvd player, a television, and a stereo and gave them to the man. She said, "I bought these gifts for you with the money because I love you so much." The 3rd one takes the $5000 and invests it in the stock market, doubles her investment, returns the $5000 to the man and reinvests...

Our town's oldest paperboy died today, at 84.

86 are wondering where their Daily Mirror's got to....

When Jane first met Tarzan in the jungle, she was instantly attracted to him and during her questions about his life, she asked him if he had ever had sex. "Tarzan not know sex." he replied. Jane explained to him what it was.

Tarzan said, "Ohhh...Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree." Horrified, Jane said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothing and lay down on the ground. "Here." she said, pointing to her privates. "You must put it in here." Tarzan removed his loin cloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer to her and kicked her right in the crotch! Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually, she managed to gasp for air and screamed, "What did you do that...

My girlfriend broke up with me for being too “un-American”

I saw it coming from a kilometre away...

My wife emailed me our wedding photos, but I couldn’t open any of the files.

I always have trouble with emotional attachments....

Two Italian men get on a bus

They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say: "Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time." "You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. In this country we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives." "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sex?...