...Thanks to the internet we now know that's not true
Thứ Sáu, 26 tháng 3, 2021
A man is stranded on a desert island for 10 years
One day he sees a beautiful woman in a swimsuit come ashore.
She says to him, "Tell me, how long has it been since you had a drink?"
He replies "Ten years" and with that she reveals a bottle of whiskey from within her swimsuit, which the man starts drinking from.
She then asks, "Tell me, how long has it been since you smoked a cigar?"
He replies "Again, 10 years" and with that she pulls out a cigar and lighter from within her swimsuit and he starts smoking.
She then seductively unzips her swimsuit and says, "Now tell me....how long has it been since you've had some real fun?"
"My god" he replies. "Don't tell me you've got a playstation in there!"
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, “Doctor, I have a terrible problem with gas, but it doesn’t bother me much.”
My farts are always silent and never smell. I probably farted 15 times since I’ve been here, and you didn’t realize it.
The doctor says, “Interesting. Why don’t you take these pills and come see me in a week?”
The old lady returns in a week and says, “I don’t know what the hell you gave me. My farts are still silent, but my God, they stink!!”
The doctor says, “Excellent. Now that your sinuses are cleared, let’s work on your hearing.”
Thứ Năm, 25 tháng 3, 2021
A Rather Distasteful Joke
New students at Medical School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human body. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet.
The professor began the lecture by telling them: "In medicine, it is necessary to possess two important qualities as a doctor: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body."
To illustrate, he pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the anus of the corpse, withdrew it, and licked it.
"Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and licking it.
When everyone finished, the professor looked at them and said, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and licked my index finger. Now learn to pay attention."
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