Just like yo mamma
Thứ Hai, 3 tháng 5, 2021
Cops gave me a ticket for doing 120 in a 55....
When he asked me why I was going so fast, I told him, "My wife left me for a police officer last week. I thought you were him trying to bring her back."
Three men walk into a bar. One works for Budweiser, one works for Corona, and one works for Guinness.
"What would you like?" the bartender asks the Budweiser worker.
"I'll have a Budweiser," says the Budweiser worker.
"And you?" the bartender asks the Corona worker.
"I'll have a Corona," responds the Corona worker.
"Let me guess," the bartender says to the Guinness worker, "you'd like a Guinness?"
"No thank you," comes the reply. "I'll just have some water."
"Water?" The bartender is taken aback. "Why not Guinness?"
"Because," says the Guinness worker, "if the other two aren't gonna have beer, I'm not gonna have it either."
Three babies in the womb discuss what they would like to be when they grow up.
Three babies in the womb discuss what they would like to be when they grow up. The first one says, “I wanna be a plumber, so I can fix the pipes in here.” The second one says, “I wanna be an electrician, so I can get some lights in here.” The third one says, “I wanna be a boxer.” The others look confused and ask, “Why do you want to be a boxer?” He proudly replies, “So I can beat the hell out of that rude bald guy who keeps coming in here and spitting on us.”
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