I don't have the balls to tell them I had a vasectomy
Thứ Ba, 6 tháng 7, 2021
Three beautiful young girls are walking along the beach when they come across a man sunbathing.
He has no arms or legs. The first girl goes up to him and says, "Have you ever been hugged?" The man shakes his head, so she bends down and gives him a big hug.
The second girl asks him if he has ever been kissed. Again he shakes his head so she bends down and gives him a long lingering kiss.
Then the third girl asks him if he has ever been fucked. "No, no," he stammers, his face lighting up in anticipation.
"Well, you are now," she replies "the tide's coming in."
Thứ Hai, 5 tháng 7, 2021
Right after takeoff, a pilot comes on the microphone to welcome his passengers. “Thank you for flying with us. The weather is....” Then he suddenly starts screaming while still on the mic, “OH MY GOD! IT IS BURNING!!, IT IS BURNING!” Then silence...
A few seconds later, he comes back on and says, “I’m terribly sorry about what happened. I spilled some scorching hot coffee on my lap...you should see my pants!!” r>A voice from the back of the plane yelled, “Why don’t you come here and see ours?”
A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. (NSFW)
A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase.
He asks, “What are you doing?”
She answers, “I’m moving to London. I heard prostitutes there get paid £400 for doing what I do for you for free.”
Later that night, on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he’s going,he replies,
“I’m coming too I want to see how you live on £800 a year”.
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