She replies, "I don’t like calling you when you’re at work."
Chủ Nhật, 18 tháng 7, 2021
A husband and wife are having issues in the bedroom. The wife can't orgasm because it's too damn hot.
They see a sex therapist, and he recommends that they have a constant supply of cool air in the bedroom, so the man asks his best friend to waft a towel while he and his wife make love. Begrudgingly, the friend submits and says yes.
After 20 minutes of lovemaking, the woman is no closer to orgasm, so the friend wafting the towel recommends that they switch places. So the friend is now having sex with the woman while the husband wafts the towel.
After two minutes, the woman starts to tremble and lets out an incredible cry as she reaches the most intense orgasm she has ever had.
The husband looks at his friend, and proudly proclaims, "Now that, my friend, is how you waft a fucking towel."
When I was a boy, my dad gave me money to go downtown and pay the electric bill
But instead, I bought raffle tickets for a chance to win a new truck.
I told my dad when I got home and he beat my ass.
The next morning, however, there was a brand new truck in the driveway.
We all held each other and cried, especially me because it was the truck from the electric company there to turn off the lights.
So dad beat my ass again
Mr. and Mrs. Johnson had been happily married for decades, but there was one thing that bothered Mr. Johnson.
They had five sons named Al, Ben, Carl, Dan, and Edgar. Now Al, Ben, Carl, and Dan were all tall, thin, and handsome, but Edgar was short, fat, and ugly. Throughout his life, Mr. Johnson wondered if Edgar was really his son, but he never built up the courage to ask his wife.
Finally, the day came when Mr. Johnson lay dying on a hospital bed. He realized that asking his wife about Edgar was now or never.
"There is just one thing I want to know before I die," said Mr. Johnson. "Is Edgar really my son?"
"Yes, my darling husband," replied Mrs. Johnson. "Yes, he is your son."
"Thank you," said Mr. Johnson, and breathed his final breath, which was the most relieved breath he had ever taken.
"Phew!" said Mrs. Johnson. "Thank goodness he didn't ask about the other four..."
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