For example, there is 1 silent "K" in "Knight.
And 4 silent "K"s in the word "Knickknack."
As well as 3 silent "K"s in the word "Republican."
Thứ Hai, 19 tháng 7, 2021
The case of the missing condoms
A girl I was friends with in high school called me crying today. She had a question she needed to ask a guy friend. She said her boyfriend had just bought a box of a dozen condoms and now there are only six left, but they only had sex three times. When confronted her boyfriend said that sometimes he uses them when he masturbates and she wanted to know if I ever did that.
I told her, "I am not proud of it, but sometimes I have to."
She starts to calm down and asks, "Why do you have to masturbate with a condom sometimes?"
I said, "I dunno... I have never done that, I thought you meant lie to my girlfriend."
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Sorry if this is a repost - I heard it from a radio station a long time ago.
A man wanted to try 69 with his girlfriend
Right in the middle the man realizes he has a dentist appointment. So he pops up and heads to the bathroom. He brushes his teeth 3 times. He uses mouth wash twice and flosses once for good measure.
He gets to the dentist office just in time and his dentist calls him in. Dentist says open wide. Feeling confident he opens his mouth wide. The dentist gets close and says “have you been 69’ing?” The man shocked quickly ask, “why does my breath smell like pussy?”
“No”, the dentist replies, “your forehead smells like shit.”
A husband notices his wife’s hearing is deteriorating and decides to visit her doctor for advice.
“I can’t speak to my wife directly as she might find it offensive, given our old age” he says to the doc.
“There’s a simple trick you can try to determine her hearing” explains the doctor. “Simply ask her a question at a distance and if she doesn’t hear you, move slightly closer and ask again until she does”.
That night, the husband arrives home and sees his wife in the kitchen cooking. He thinks to himself, “what a perfect opportunity to test her hearing”.
He stands in the doorway of the kitchen and promptly asks;
“What’s for dinner honey?”
No answer. He moves closer.
“What’s for dinner honey?”
Still no answer. He moves even closer.
“What’s for dinner honey?”
Still his wife doesn’t answer. He now sees how serious her hearing problem is. At this point, he is stood right next to his wife.
“What’s for dinner honey?”
“FOR THE FOURTH FUCKING TIME WE’RE HAVING CHICKEN”
An officer needed some change so he asked a near by soldier.
Officer: “Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?”
Soldier: “Sure, buddy.”
Officer: “That’s no way to address an officer! Now, let’s try it again!”
Officer: “Soldier. Do you have change for a dollar?”
Soldier: “No, SIR!”
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