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Racists
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The French
Thứ Hai, 2 tháng 8, 2021
A couple was invited to a swanky costume party. Unfortunately, the wife came down with a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone.
He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without pain and, as it was still early enough, decided to go the party. Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he could, and copping a little touch here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new babe that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished...Naturally, (since he was her husband.) Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed. So off they went to one of the cars and had a quickie. Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behaviour. She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of a time he had. He said: "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there." "Did you dance much ?" "You know, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Browning and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But you're not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my costume to."
A woman places an ad in the local newspaper. “Looking for a man with three qualifications: won’t beat me up, won’t run away from me, and would be IMMENSELY good in bed”.
Two days later her doorbell rings. “Hi, I’m Sam. I have no arms so I won’t beat you, and no legs so I won’t run away.” “What makes you think you are great in bed?” the woman retorts.
Sam replies, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”
A man and his wife are feeling like their sex life is getting stale
They’ve already tried just about everything, so after some discussion they decide to really mix it up and try ear sex.
They plan a special night for it and when the night comes, they put the kids to bed and get ready for sexy times.
They start normally and work up to the ear penetration and they find that they’re actually both enjoying it quite a bit more than they expected. It doesn’t take long for the man to get close to completion but just as he’s about to finish, his wife wife pushes him off and tells him to stop, quickly covering herself.
Naturally, he’s concerned and immediately asks her what happened. After a brief hesitation she responds:
“I’m sorry babe, I could have sworn I heard someone coming!”
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