Can I take a skin graft from my butt and put it on someone who isn't related?

ass skin for a friend...

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Do you smoke?

Lady: Do you smoke? Guy: Yes I do. Lady: How many packs a day? Guy: 3 packs. Lady: How much per pack? Guy: $10.00 per pack. Lady: And how long have you been smoking? Guy: 15 years Lady: So 1 pack is $10.00 and you have been smoking 3 packs a day which puts your spending per month at $900. In 1 year, it would have been $10,800. Correct? Guy: Correct. Lady: If 1 year you spend $10,800, not accounting for inflation, the past 15 years puts your spending total at $162,000. Correct? Guy: Correct. Lady: Do you know if you hadn't smoke, that money could...

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What do you get when you eat 3.14 slices of cake?

Diabetes. What?, did you really think I was gonna make a pie joke on my cake day? btw I waited 1 whole year to tell this joke...

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If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date,

chances are... you have small boobs....

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I've been taking Viagra for my sunburn.

It doesn't cure it but it keeps the sheets off my legs at night....

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I'm emotionally constipated.

I haven't given a shit in days....

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What does a 9-volt battery and an asshole have in common?

You know it's wrong, but eventually you put your tongue on it....

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