How can you tell that your girlfriend is getting fat?

She fits into your wife's clothes....

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My first time having sex was a lot like my first high-school football game.

I was bruised and bloody in the end but at least my dad came....

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Chinese takeout, $15.00, gas to get there, $1.50. Getting home to find they've forgotten one of your dishes.

Riceless....

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A CNN reporter, a BBC reporter, and an Israeli commando are captured by ISIS in Iraq and brought to the terrorists' camp.

The leader of the terrorists told them that he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded. The CNN Reporter said, "Well, I’m an American, so I’d like one last hamburger with French fries.” The leader nodded to an underling who left and returned with the burger & fries. The reporter ate it and said “Now, I can die.” The BBC Reporter said, "I’m a reporter to the end. I want to take out my tape recorder and describe the scene here and what’s about to happen. Maybe someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job...

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Trump Grill Could Be the Worst Restaurant in America

Trump Grill Could Be the Worst Restaurant in America And it reveals everything you need to know about our next president. December 15, 2016 at 09:31PM via Digg http://ift.tt/2hoKv...

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I was furious when I found my wife's profile on an on-line dating website.

That lying bitch isn't, "Fun to be around."...

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I have the body of a 25 year old supermodel

But it takes up too much space in my freezer...

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