They obviously haven’t been on r/jokes before
Chủ Nhật, 6 tháng 5, 2018
A police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding and the guy gradually increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph.
He eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over.
The cop approaches the car and says, "It's been a long day and my tour is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behavior, I'll let you go."
The guy thinks for a few seconds and then says, "My wife ran away with a cop about a week ago. I thought you might be that officer trying to give her back!"
10 years ago I married my best friend.
My wife is still really angry about it. But me and Dave were drunk and thought it was funny
Where's the spoon?
A man is sitting in a restaurant and calls the waiter over.
Man: Try the soup.
Waiter: What is wrong with the soup? Is it too salty?
Man: Just try the soup.
Waiter: Is the soup too hot?
Man: Just try the soup!
Waiter: Is the soup too cold?
Man: JUST TRY THE GODDAMN SOUP!!
Waiter: Fine. Where's the spoon?
Man: That's the problem.
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