St. Peter tells them that the rules have changed, and they can only be let in to heaven now if they have had a really bad death. He then proceeds to get their stories one at a time.
The first man explains. "I live on the 25th floor of my apartment building. I came home from work early today, because I suspected my wife was cheating on me. There she was, naked as the day she was born. I look around, and spot two hands gripping the balcony. There's a man hanging from my balcony, in just his underwear, 25 floors above the ground! I step on the bastards fingers, he won't let go. I bite his fingers, he wouldn't let go. Finally I grab a hammer, that did the trick and he fell. But then the lucky bastard landed in some bushes and survived!! So I yanked the fridge loose, shoved it over the balcony, and it landed directly on the bastard! But I'm afraid all that exertion gave me a heart attack, so here I am."
St. Peter decided that was a bad enough death and let him in, then proceeded to get the second guys story. The man looked quite confused.
"I live on the 26th floor of my apartment building. I work the night shift, so I wake up in the early afternoon. I had just woken up, and was doing my exercises on my balcony when I slipped. But thank God, I caught the railing on the balcony below mine. I was saved! There I was, hanging 25 floors above the ground, when suddenly this crazy man came out screaming. He stepped on my fingers, I held on. He bit my fingers, I held on still. But then the bastard grabbed a hammer! I couldn't handle that and I let go. Just as I expected to die, I landed in some bushes and lived!! It was a miracle! As I started to thank God for letting me live, this fridge just falls out of the sky and lands on me. So here I am."
St. Peter decided that was definitely a bad death and lets him in. Then he asks the last guy for his story, this man also looked confused.
"Picture this: I'm hiding naked inside a fridge..."
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