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Thứ Năm, 15 tháng 1, 2015
America Needs To Find This Missing Wallaby Before It Gets Eaten By A Bear
Everybody stop what you’re doing, fly to Washington, and join the search.
Searchers are scouring woodlands in Washington state for a wallaby that has gone missing from a petting zoo. It is a case that has the potential to irreparably damage U.S.-Australian relations should anything happen to the adorable animal.
The Outback Kangaroo Farm in Arlington / Via Facebook: 332310508558
"Bella took off across Highway 530 and down the embankment towards the river," the petting zoo wrote on Facebook. "We have not located her since."
The petting zoo is concerned for Bella's safety, given the bears and coyotes that roam the woods.
"There are several predators in the area and as night falls, temperatures drop, which requires a heating lamp for our sweet Bella," the zoo wrote.
"She isn't afraid of people, but could very well just be startled because she has been out for a few days."
Reuters reported that a pet psychic has offered to join the search, telling the zoo's owners she could feel the wallaby's heartbeat.
The Outback Kangaroo Farm in Arlington
Come back, Bella!
Two men are drinking in a bar.
One of them looks across the bar and sees two old drunks sitting at a table. He turns to his friend and says, "In ten years, that'll be us."
His friend looks and says, "That's a mirror, dumbass."
A Czechoslovakian man and a black man are walking through the woods.
A Czechoslovakian man and a black man are walking through the woods. When they happened upon a male and a female bear. One of the bears runs to the Czechoslovakian and gobbles him up. The black man, in a panic runs to find help. He found two rangers. "You need to help me! My Czechoslovakian friend just got eaten by a bear!" The black man leads the two rangers to the scene of the incident. The first ranger asks him which bear. The black man replies, "The male." "Are you absolutely sure?" Asked the first ranger. "Positive!" Replied the black man.
The first ranger goes over to the female bear, kills her, and tears her stomach open. Sure enough, the Czechoslovakian was there.
Second ranger asks, "How did you know to check the female?" First ranger replies, "Don't you know that you never trust a black man when he says his Czech is in the male?"
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