How do you think the unthinkable?

With an itheberg

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What's the difference between a blowjob and anal sex?

One makes your day and the other makes your hole weak.

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Dark humour is like a child with cancer

It never gets old.

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A guy walks into a bookstore...

A guy walks into a bookstore and asks the assistant, "Hey, do you know if you guys have the new book for guys with short penises?"

The assistant says, "I'm not sure if it's in yet."

Guy says, "Yeah, that's the one!"

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First day on the job

A taxi passenger taps the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screams, loses control of the car, nearly hits a bus, goes up on the footpath, and stops centimeters from a shop window.

For a second, everything goes quiet in the cab, then the driver says, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!"

The passenger apologizes and says, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much.”

The driver replies, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver, but I've been a hearse driver for the last 25 years!"

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I once farted in the Apple Store and everybody got pissed

It's not my fault they don't have Windows

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Why does Kim Jong Un love books?

Because he is the Supreme Reader.

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